Ok, so I have been slacking! But I have been doing the pod cast, so I’m not too concerned that I am not staying on track with this part of my challenge.
However…
I am not keeping up with the main challenge. I got completely discombobulated and lost the plot along the way. I think that it, the challenge, was moving too fast for me. Or it is compressed too much for me grasp the details, and seems that I’m missing bits of it, although looking through the schedule, I haven’t skipped anything.
So rather than throw in the towel, as I would have done in the past, I am going back through it and doing another parallel course that is much more explanatory. If I don’t complete it within the time frame, that’s ok because then I will have more knowledge and can complete and create the funnels on my own.
The whole concept is new to me and initially, I thought I understood it, but as we got deeper into it, I realized I hadn’t grasped the whole picture. Very frustrating, but instead of beating myself over the head and backing away from it because I wouldn’t be first or the best, I am determined to keep moving forward, more at my own pace, but also with a finish line out there.
Looking Over My Shoulder
I spent the whole day working, focusing on this, which is something I haven’t done for a long time. Up until just recently, I have felt like someone was looking over my shoulder and judging me for what I am doing, whether it’s working at something, either too much or not enough; or cooking or playing and being silly with the animals. And thinking back to my ex, that is what he did, consistently and even though he has been out of my life for 10 years now (thank heaven!) those feelings of being judged have remained.
But just since I started writing this blog, really, I have pushed all that shit away. If I want to work on this project all day, whose to say I can’t? There isn’t anyone to complain or mock me about my work ethic or the things I like to do. I can do whatever I damn well please! I can dress however I please, eat when and what I want and do whatever I want! There’s no one to please except myself.
So there!
My Companions
Can you get any more relaxed?
The two dogs I am caring for at this house sit, have absolutely stolen my heart! They are the sweetest things! You just have to look at them and the tails start waving and Delilah begins to wiggle! They have their routines and I can tell the time by what they want!
The first time out walking with them, I had my phone out and ready to make sure I knew how to get home but there was absolutely no need for that as they led the way, taking me on their known morning route. And so well-behaved and happy, it’s just a pleasure to be with them.
And the house is great too. I feel very comfortable here; it’s the kind of house I would have, were I to ever drop the “location independent” tag and live a more appropriate life!